Pure Madnesson
News and politics from Madison, Wisconsin... with a twist. Everything contained herein is intended as satire. Please do not take it too seriously. It's pure madness! . Email Pure Madnesson at puremadnesson@yahoo.com.Archives
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Saturday, April 08, 2006
Konkel for Mayor
According to some of her colleagues, Alderwoman Brenda Konkel may be quietly preparing for a run against Madison Mayor Dave Cieslewicz in 2007. Konkel recently got a shorter, more stylish haircut and is rumored to have also gotten a pedicure. Alderman Jed Sanborn, who sits next to Konkel at City Council meetings, says that he really likes "the pretty color of her painted toenails when she wears sandals."
Others claim that Konkel will soon be trading in those sandals for pumps, though. Alderwoman Cindy Thomas recently spotted Brenda shopping at Talbots. According to Thomas, "Brenda bought a couple of suits, some high heeled shoes, a dress, and lots of frilly accessories. It was all very classy and very professional. I think she's planning something." Thomas adds that Konkel even bought several pairs of pantyhose. Alderman Zach Brandon says he saw Konkel at Morgan Shoes and "she wasn't browsing the Birkenstocks."
Konkel has been doing more than just shopping for clothes. An employee at Eye Contact reports that she recently ordered a new trendy pair of glasses and is also considering colored contacts. The employee claims, "She told me she wants to change her entire image to something more conservative and professional." And Alderwoman Judy Compton even ran into Konkel shopping the lady razor aisle at Walgreens. Could this mean no more hairy armpit jokes?
"Brenda cut her hair and got a pedicure. She's shopping for clothes and fancy shoes. Ditching the glasses for colored contacts and even shaving her underarms. I've heard she has an appointment next month at Glamour Shots. This can only mean one thing. She's running for mayor," concludes Alderman Brandon who has worked as a political consultant in the past. Konkel's Progressive Dane colleague, Alderman Austin King (who just got a haircut himself, reportedly to look more professional for his first real job) claims to know nothing of Konkel's mayoral ambition.
When asked about her intentions, Alderwoman Konkel answers with a girlish giggle, "I won't rule out any possibilities."
Others claim that Konkel will soon be trading in those sandals for pumps, though. Alderwoman Cindy Thomas recently spotted Brenda shopping at Talbots. According to Thomas, "Brenda bought a couple of suits, some high heeled shoes, a dress, and lots of frilly accessories. It was all very classy and very professional. I think she's planning something." Thomas adds that Konkel even bought several pairs of pantyhose. Alderman Zach Brandon says he saw Konkel at Morgan Shoes and "she wasn't browsing the Birkenstocks."
Konkel has been doing more than just shopping for clothes. An employee at Eye Contact reports that she recently ordered a new trendy pair of glasses and is also considering colored contacts. The employee claims, "She told me she wants to change her entire image to something more conservative and professional." And Alderwoman Judy Compton even ran into Konkel shopping the lady razor aisle at Walgreens. Could this mean no more hairy armpit jokes?
"Brenda cut her hair and got a pedicure. She's shopping for clothes and fancy shoes. Ditching the glasses for colored contacts and even shaving her underarms. I've heard she has an appointment next month at Glamour Shots. This can only mean one thing. She's running for mayor," concludes Alderman Brandon who has worked as a political consultant in the past. Konkel's Progressive Dane colleague, Alderman Austin King (who just got a haircut himself, reportedly to look more professional for his first real job) claims to know nothing of Konkel's mayoral ambition.
When asked about her intentions, Alderwoman Konkel answers with a girlish giggle, "I won't rule out any possibilities."
